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Life In HD: Transformation Tuesday

August 21st, 2018
Posted in Uncategorized

Life was good …

at least a lot of it was.

But the things that weren’t good… It showed up in the way I was living. I mean, don’t get me wrong… It’s a blessing to experience life, experience friendships… and create memories, but not at the expense of health, and my faith.

For as much as I did right in my younger years, there’s a lot I did wrong.

In the moments- it was about living life… living it up… being crunk so to speak, but a lot of that stemmed from hurt, and even at my lowest moments… depression.

It’s kind of funny, I consider myself one of the strongest women I know; I’ve endured a lot & overcome a lot, however… there was a time when I was “broken.” I use quotations because I really just needed to call on GOD to see that I was ok (experiencing suffering but not broken) & that I was His daughter, created in His image, however after experiencing so much hurt, I was blinded by my sadness, driven by my anger and my focus definitely wasn’t locked in on my faith.

It was there. It always has been.

But… it wasn’t my priority.

I thank GOD for keeping me, especially when I wasn’t keeping myself.

Going out with friends turned into a way to not deal with some of life’s pressures. Drinking became the norm, and that only led to some poor decisions, nights I can’t remember, weight gain and even getting in trouble.

I was taking care of my business, passing my classes, performing well during concerts, recitals etc… but on the inside, a part of me was struggling for survival.

In 2009, the healing process began. After graduation, I headed back home. For the first time I felt like I could breathe again. Leaving WV for me was the start of getting back to really loving myself.

It wasn’t easy; I had created bad habits that were hard to break- I still spent that summer partying more nights than I care to admit. BUT… I started losing weight, actively seeking GOD, and over time, I was able to smile for the right reasons. I was ready to leave behind the things and people I allowed to hold me back… even old self.

In 2010, I met my now husband. He saw something in me… the person I’ve been working to become before I even fully saw it in myself. He has been a big part of my reason to smile, to fight & overcome past hurt, struggles etc.

Neither of us have it all together, but the love we have for each other pushes us to keep growing… both separately and together.

I was blessed to marry my best friend in 2014.

2011, 2013, 2016 and soon to be 2018, GOD blessed me with amazing, beautiful babies. To say they have helped become the best version of myself to date is an understatement. Daily I am inspired and motivated by my children to do better, to evolve, to grow, to set a good example, to teach them, to train them up in the way they should go, to share GOD’s love and teachings with them… to really be the best wife and momma bear that I can be.

Ultimately GOD saved me; when I found out I was expecting for the first time, life was forever different for me. My sons life mattered much more than my own, and in order to take care of him, I had to take care of me.

Look at me now… doing all good without the people and things I thought I couldn’t live without.

GOD truly upgraded my life, and for that I’m forever thankful. His favor is unmatched. His love is without conditions. His grace has set me free. His presence makes my life better daily. Thank you Lord for loving me how you do!

I am still working on me, but I’m learning to bloom where I’m planted!

Wife.

Mother.

Daughter.

Sister.

And, so. Much. More.

QUEEN

I pray this testimony blesses someone. Transparency is necessary at times, and granted this is only a small portion of my story, I am so excited to be able to use it for GOD’s glory!

Until next time, be blessed!

Xoxo,

Heaven

PS- remember, you are not required to be the same person. You are allowed to grow. The past is just that- let it be for reflection only, not how you define yourself. You hold the pen… let GOD lead you in writing the next chapters of your life. G R O W.

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